Superman

First, a warning. There are spoilers ahead. If you haven't seen this movie and you want to, then please don't read anymore, no matter how much you need my writing to continue living. I promise I will post more for my adoring fans.

So anyway, on with the spoilers...

On Sunday night San Nakji made the move from his house to the movie theatre to watch Superman Returns with Mrs SN and Those Of Little Significance (TOLS). San Nakji likes a bit of a Superhero movie or two, especially Spiderman 1 and 2, Batman Begins, Hellboy and so on. Exclude me however from the Daredevil, Electra and Punisher fan clubs please. I feel I am digressing, but stick with me, it's going to be a hell of a ride!

One of the greatest heroes of superhero movie fans has to be Christopher Reeve. He played Superman just the way we imagined him. As an actor he was typecasted forever, but the fans were happy and you have to give us what we want! I was devastated by his death and so when I heard that the new Superman movie would continue on from these movies, I thought I should check it out.

One thing I heard was that the new Superman looked a lot like our Mr Reeve. I can assure you he doesn't. This comes from someone who pretty much thinks clouds he sees in the sky are devils predicting doom (well, not THINKS, more like KNOWS). Yup, I think everything looks like something, but I don't think whathisface the new Superman looks anything like Christopher. They both have the flying thing going for them, but that's about it. The new Lois Lane just doesn't compare to the old one. The old one was way more 'New York', if you know what I mean and this Bosworth woman is just annoying.

The movie itself is pretty enjoyable. The director tried to keep the 'camp' sort of feel of the original movies and I think he did pretty well. Kevin Spacey is a good Lex Luthor although he isn't really scary enough for my liking except when he is yelling at Lois Lane. I have to tell you she needs a good yelling at too!

The thing that really annoys me about this movie is the rediculous plot against the world. Lex Luthor has stolen the crystals from Superman's Fortress of Solitude and when you put them in water they expand into land... Yup, you heard me right. Just like one of those towel things that is really tiny and then turns into a big towel in water, know the one? Lex dumps one of the coast of Metropolis and plans to live on the land produced. One of the major troubles here is the land is really crap. It's just rock. There aren't any trees or water or anything, just a bunch of rocks. It's just rediculous I tell you! Now if I were a bad guy I would go with the tried and true laser on the moon or nuclear missile aimed at the white house trick. Growing land? What the hell?

The movie is loooooooong. 2 1/2 hours. You know who's fault this is? That Cameron guy who directed Titanic (I want to say Kirk..., but that ain't right!) and Aotearoa's very own Peter Jackson. They showed the world that really long movies can work. Well Hollywood, sometimes they just don't! Ever go to one of those films where you kept checking your watch? This was one of them!

Ready for the big spoiler? Superman has a son.... (Excuse me while I vomit...)

Anyone bored of Kryptonite? So so bored!

I give this film 5 tentacles out of 8. It was pretty fun, but too long and the bad guy was just being stupid!

San Nakji for President!